December 08, 2004

Strange things are afoot at the Circle K

I was standing in line at the gas station this evening when this lady rushed in all out of breath and asked where the fill it ins for the state lottery. Mike, the cashier, told her that it was in the back of the store near the soda cooler. She disappeared for a little while while I was talking to Mike. About five minutes later she rushes back up to the counter and lays those fill it ins on the counter top and plops down her debit card and says,"Here, I'm in a hurry!" Mike tells her that the lottery is cash only no checks no cards. Period.
"Where's an ATM?" she asked quickly. By the door was where she was directed. Mike and I resumed our conversation for the moment until we heard,"Sh*t! Sh*t! Sh*t! D*mn! @#$%$#@!!! And she started kicking the machine. Mike politely asked the lady to calm down. She did for a moment. She got her money. She went back up to the counter. She handed him her stack of fill ins(all 35 of them). Mike ran each one through the loto machine one at a time for this lady and as he did, the line started growing. Someone in the line muttered something about the "G*d D*mned lottery" and how he hated people who tied up a line with it. She lit into that guy with a line of expletives I wont repeat here. The strangest thing about this whole surreal situation was that the woman looked to be in her early forties. She was dressed very conservatively. I mean She looked a Lot like someone you'd associate with being an elementary school teacher, or possibly a Ministers Wife. This lady used foul language as if she grew up on a sailors ship and spent her days tattooing and piercing various parts of the boys on said ship.
Also, when I see someone buy a pack of cigarettes, I'll generally say something along the lines of "That'll stunt your growth." This evening a midget bought a pack o' smokes and I couldn't stop myself before I realized that I had said my usual statement aloud. The vertically challenged person looked me up and further up and said "Screw you tallboy!" Mike was almost in tears from holding in his laughter.

Random thought today: If you are at a party and a dog humps your leg, don't laugh it off. Be Offended!
Why should you be offended? Here's why, The dog is thinking: I've looked around at everyone else here and you are the only person I think I"ve got a chance to score with.

that's enough for today.


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